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How do I prepare for a first date (I’m male)? - Printable Version

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How do I prepare for a first date (I’m male)? - Williamm - 10-18-2020

Before the date is even a date
A lot of your preparation has to happen before you even ask her out, namely, getting to know the area you're going to take her. It shouldn't be somewhere you've never been. Since you're making the plans, she'll be counting on you to know your way around. If you don't, she's going to feel powerless and frustrated.
Before you even have a date in mind, head to the place you're thinking of taking future dates and walk around for an hour with a notebook. Write down any places you can bounce to after your initial meeting - video game arcades, ice cream shops, bars, bowling alleys, malls, etc. Practice walking from your primary venue to each of these places so you know the way without following a GPS. When you plan the date, pick three spots within walking distance of each other to check out. Each activity should ideally take about one hour. You want your plans to be open to spontaneity, but you should be able to go three hours before you run out of stuff to do.
I've found that even when women asked me out, they've often still expected me to plan out the date and know my way around the venue. You have the option of using this as an opportunity to filter out unreasonable women, but if you decide you want to deal with it, arrive at the venue 60 to 90 minutes early and do the same routine. Go for a walk around the area and look for stuff to do. This can suck if she stands you up, but on the bright side, you've just scoped out a new venue for future dates.
Right before the date
My pre-date procedure was never anything elaborate. Take a shower, put on deodorant, floss, brush your teeth and tongue, dress casually but well, and do whatever to your hair you usually do (in my case, nothing). Review your plan for the date, and consider arriving 15-30 minutes early to make sure everything's good to go. If you have doubts about her showing up, send her a text an hour beforehand. "Hey, still good for 6?" Don't leave until she replies.
Make sure you're in the right mindset. You're going to hang out, have fun, and find out if you're compatible. You're not looking to get laid. You don't have to impress her. Your self-worth isn't on the line here. The worst case scenario is you have a crappy time, and you've already done everything you can to make sure that doesn't happen. The rest is luck.
Preparation for after the date
In addition to your date plan, you should be prepared for her to come over and hook up. Like I said, this isn't the goal, and it probably won't happen with most women, but it might. Clean your place up so it's presentable. Try not to have dirty laundry or garbage on the floor. If it smells, clean up whatever smells. Make your bed. It doesn't have to be immaculate. You'll find that when women take you back to their places, they'll almost always say "my place is a mess" before inviting you in. This is letting you know two things - "of course I wasn't planning on sleeping with you tonight," and, "I'm normally much cleaner than this." If your place is immaculate, it sort of implies you were expecting her to come home with you, and that rubs some women the wrong way. So don't worry about your place looking awesome - just make sure it doesn't smell and she won't feel grossed out sleeping there.
In addition to cleaning up, make sure you have some condoms, and maybe some lube, available if you need them. Some women carry condoms, but as the guy, it's really your responsibility. Some nice alcoholic beverages, candles, and music, aren't bad ideas either.
Ultimately, it’s not so different from hanging out with your friends, except that romantic feelings and sex may be involved. She's a person too. She'll be nervous, hopeful, and all the emotions you might expect. Have fun, laugh, reassure her, and relax. It’s great if it works out, it’s no big deal if it doesn’t.
Good luck and have fun.


RE: How do I prepare for a first date (I’m male)? - Camilla - 10-19-2020

So, dating is crucial for a relationship, and it is usually impossible to have a happy marriage without knowing each other; starting an acquaintance with one another while already married seems like a bad idea for most people. You can read more about additional reading. I believe that the couple should decide that it is time for the wedding.